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Before You Discipline, Ask This: What Is This Student Trying to Say?

Written by Michale Taylor | Aug 2, 2025 3:30:50 AM

Before You Discipline, Ask This: What Is This Student Trying to Say?

Understanding Student Behavior | Trauma-Informed Speaker

by Michale Taylor – Trauma-Informed Speaker & Behavior Intervention Advocate

 

💬 Introduction:

When a student curses, shuts down, or walks out of class, the typical reaction is punishment.

But what if we paused and asked, “What is this student trying to say with their behavior?”

Because behavior is communication—and sometimes it’s the only language a student has left.

🧠 Behavior Is a Message, Not a Mistake

Students who act out are rarely trying to disrespect you. They’re trying to express something—hurt, fear, overwhelm, abandonment, or confusion.

If we only address the action without addressing the root, we’re solving the wrong problem.

📈 The Link Between Trauma and Behavior

➡️ Statistic: 1 in 3 children in the U.S. has experienced at least one adverse childhood experience (ACE). — CDC

That means nearly every classroom includes students navigating trauma—often in silence.

🎤 What I Share in My School Presentations

My trauma-informed school assemblies and staff trainings focus on:

  • Recognizing behavioral red flags as signals, not just disruptions

  • Teaching students to name their emotions before they act them out

  • Creating classroom cultures where emotions aren’t punished—they’re processed

  • Giving students emotional regulation tools they can use in real time

I help educators and students speak a shared language: empathy.

🔁 Why This Supports PBIS, SEL, and Restorative Practice

Instead of punitive cycles, I help schools implement practices that:

  • Encourage accountability with support

  • Increase emotional fluency among students

  • Promote safer, more inclusive school environments

  • Reduce repeated behavioral incidents long-term

📥 Let’s Shift from Reaction to Restoration

If you want more than short-term behavior management, you need long-term mindset transformation.

🔗 Book a Trauma-Informed Assembly or Training

✍🏽 Reflection Prompt for Students:

📝 “If someone could really hear you right now, what would you want them to know about how you feel?”

📣 Final Thoughts

Discipline without understanding is damage control.
Discipline with compassion is character development.

When we ask, “What are you trying to say?”
We start giving students the space—and skills—to say it in healthier ways.